A small update, er, backdate, on gay marriage

By Eric Black

My post of last Thursday made a fairly big deal of the fact that all the DFL guv candidates are pledged to sign a law legalizing same-sex marriage in Minnesota. And it is an important marker on the change in the overall political environment around gay marriage.

But Tim Bonham of Stonewall DFL, a pro-GLBT rights organization (obviously associated with the DFL) informs me that the DFL platform has favored equal marriage rights for all couples since 1972.

Of course, not all candidates including the eventual nominees agree with everything in the party platform and, if they win office, they are more likely to feel bound to the position they personally took during the campaign. But I do find it a tad surprising/interesting that this has been the party's official position for 37 years. In fact, the Stonewall website says that the DFL was the first major party in the country to adopt such a platform plank. The current DFL platform takes the following positions on gay rights issues:

• Allow same-gender couples to marry and to share fully and equally in the rights, responsibilities and commitment of civil marriage.
• In the absence of marriage equality, fully recognize civil unions for same-sex domestic partners and make available to them all the rights, privileges, and protections available to married couples.
• Oppose any amendment to the Minnesota Constitution that prohibits or limits marriage, civil unions, and/or legal protections to same-sex couples.
• Repeal the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy of the U.S. military and open service of gay and lesbians in the armed forces.
• Support domestic partner benefits for all public employees in Minnesota.

According to its platform, the Republican Party of Minnesota favors amending boththe Minnesota and U.S. Constitutions to define marriage as a legal union between one man and one woman. MNGOP also opposes expanding the legal rights of same-sex couples under a "civil unions" approach. Here's the the full section from the MNGOP platform on marriage issues:

The Republican Party recognizes the blessings that God has bestowed on this great
Nation. We declare our faith in Him and ask His continued guidance as we work to
preserve this government of “One Nation Under God”. We also recognize the sanctity of
human life and marriage, and the central role of the traditional family in our society.
Therefore, we believe that:

A. We need to change laws regarding marriage, divorce, adoption, child support,
welfare, taxes, and others, to encourage families to stay together. Minnesota’s laws
governing marriage should be amended to offer a ‘Covenant Marriage’ option, entailing
extensive pre-marital counseling and limits on divorce. Parental privileges of fathers in
child custody issues should be restored to comply with the 14th Amendment of the U.S.
Constitution. Grandparents and other relatives should be considered as the first option
and the logical choice when children cannot live with their parents.

B. We should amend the U.S. Constitution and the Minnesota constitution to define
marriage as the legal union between a man and a woman. We oppose civil unions or
their legal equivalents between same-sex couples.

source

Even as Maine voters quash same-sex marriage law, NY Senate may vote same-sex marriage

NY Senate could vote on same-sex law

ALBANY, N.Y. — Advocates for same-sex marriage are hitting New York’s state capital hard, trying to sway the few votes needed for final legislative approval of the bill in a special session Tuesday.

This comes a week after a Maine referendum soundly repealed that state’s new same-sex marriage law.

What appears to be a likely vote in New York is being forced by Gov. David Paterson who put it on the agenda of the extraordinary session he’s calling for Tuesday.

Although he can require the Legislature consider the bill, Paterson can’t compel lawmakers to vote. This makes for a rare moment in Albany when the outcome of the floor votes isn’t clear well before the formal action.

Meanwhile, same-sex marriage advocates remain pleased that they may finally get a vote for final legislative approval in the Senate. Still, they don’t know if there are enough votes to pass the bill.

“I think a lot of senators woke up this morning and realized a vote on marriage equality is real and could come tomorrow,” said Alan Van Capelle executive director of Empire State Pride Agenda, statewide lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender advocacy group.

“I know about their family members who are gay and lesbian, their friends who are gay lesbian, and at the end of the day I believe, when this comes to the floor, these individuals will not be able to vote against their friends and their family,” he said. “Now is the time for them to stand up and be counted. All eyes are on Albany.”

The movement suffered setbacks last Tuesday in off-year elections. In Maine, a referendum repealed the same-sex marriage law.

The Rev. Jason McGuire of New Yorkers for Constitutional Freedoms said Tuesday’s results have shown even moderate Republicans that they can’t afford to back same-sex marriage going into the 2010 elections. He said the group is confident they have 35 or 36 senators opposed to the measure, which would block passage in the 62-seat house.

“God established marriage and I don’t think the state has a right to redefine it,” McGuire said. But he said the concern is really about children, who need to learn from mothers and fathers.

“Marriage is never about two people. It’s about future generations,” he said. “It does affect what’s good for society as a whole.”

Already passed in the Democrat-led Assembly and supported by Paterson, the measure wasn’t brought to the floor in the spring because there weren’t enough votes to pass it. Democrats hold a 32-30 majority, but a few opposed the bill on religious grounds.

Republican leader Dean Skelos has released his members to vote as they see fit, freeing them from the usual bloc voting. Van Capelle of the Pride Agenda called Skelos a “genuine, honest partner in this struggle,” a switch from previous years when Senate Republicans, then in the majority, killed the measure.

The Pride Agenda released the names Monday of 700 clergy and lay leaders from across New York State who support the bill.

Meanwhile, the extraordinary session is setting up a showdown with between Paterson and the Senate over how to address a $3.2 billion deficit and allow New York to pay its December bills.

Paterson hoped his rare midyear address Monday to a joint meeting of the Legislature would draw support for his plan to cut spending, among other measures.

But the Democrat-led Senate continues to oppose his proposal, pitching its own plan that avoids what the conference calls painful cuts.

Negotiations continue, with few deals in sight.

Associated Press Writer Valerie Bauman contributed to this report from Albany.

source

HELP UNDERSTANDING MY BISEXUAL WIFE

so i have been married since may 2008 and have had a great marrage, i think, up until lately.

spring 2007: when we first met i got shot down because my wife Dar just got of a messy relationship with a guy and wanted to try girls. that lasted for about a month coupled with extacy and i was there as a friend to help her.

fall 2007: i deployed that fall to afghanistan, but just prior we fell in love and were dating. she took care of my house when i was gone and i proposed to her on one knee via viedo feed while in a combat zone. needless to say we were the best of friends and lovers.

may 2008: we got married

spring 2009: i started the local jurisdiction six month police academy. it was a lot of work and time spent at school or in a book. i couldn't be with my wife much emotionally.

aug 2009: Dar had all the tell tale signs of cheating, but was not confronted about them. i also graduated the academy on the 28th of august.

sept 2009: Dar expressed to me that she did not love me anymore and loved her friend / now lover Roxy. Dar claims that only a kiss happened between them.

end sept 2009: they fell apart and Dar came back to me. since then we have been trying counseling of all kinds. drug for her relapse to weed, p[ersonal counselor for her and about to start couples counseling w/ attention to her ADHD.

I can't help but think that she is back with me for the wrong reasons. she denies that though. tonight she is going out with two gay men for holloween, but ofcourse i have to be a cop tomorrow and cannot afford to take anymore time off.

AM I WRONG FOR THINKING THAT WE MIGHT NOT WORK OUT? HOW DO I TALK TO HER AND FIND MY OWN REASSURANCE THAT SHE LOVES ME AND JUST FINDS BOTH SEXES ATTRACTIVE? I WANT TO UNDERSTAND THE CULTURE BETTER BUT I NEED SOME GUIDANCE.

-THANKS

​‘Crash’ director Paul Haggis renounces Scientology over gay rights

PaulHaggi_Steve_Oscar-winning writer-director Paul Haggis finally quit Scientology after 32 years.

Maybe there’s hope for Tom Cruise and John Travolta.

Long known for his humanitarian and civil liberties work, Haggis ("Million Dollar Baby," "Crash") was stunned when the San Diego branch of Scientology supported Proposition 8, the state amendment that took away marriage rights for California's gay couples.

Haggis is currently filming “The Next Three Days” with Russell Crowe, Liam Neeson and another former Scientologist, Jason Beghe.

What do you think about Paul's reasons for leaving Scientology?

Do you think there will be ramifications for his Hollywood career?

Read on for more of Haggis' letter to Scientology celeb wrangler, Tommy Davis:

Dear Tommy,

As you know, for ten months now I have been writing to ask you to make
a public statement denouncing the actions of the Church of Scientology
of San Diego. Their public sponsorship of Proposition 8, a hate-filled
legislation that succeeded in taking away the civil rights of gay and
lesbian citizens of California – rights that were granted them by the
Supreme Court of our state – shames us.

I called and wrote and implored you, as the official spokesman of
the church, to condemn their actions. I told you I could not, in good
conscience, be a member of an organization where gay-bashing was
tolerated.

In that first conversation, back at the end of October of last year,
you told me you were horrified, that you would get to the bottom of it
and “heads would roll.” You promised action. Ten months passed. No action
was forthcoming. The best you offered was a weak and carefully worded
press release, which praised the church’s human rights record and took
no responsibility. Even that, you decided not to publish.

The church’s refusal to denounce the actions of these bigots,
hypocrites and homophobes is cowardly. I can think of no other word.
Silence is consent, Tommy. I refuse to consent.

I joined the Church of Scientology thirty-five years ago. During my
twenties and early thirties I studied and received a great deal of
counseling. While I have not been an active member for many years,
I found much of what I learned to be very helpful, and I still apply
it in my daily life. I have never pretended to be the best Scientologist,
but I openly and vigorously defended the church whenever it was criticized,
as I railed against the kind of intolerance that I believed was directed
against it. I had my disagreements, but I dealt with them internally.
I saw the organization – with all its warts, growing pains and
problems – as an underdog. And I have always had a thing for underdogs.

But I reached a point several weeks ago where I no longer knew what to
think. You had allowed our name to be allied with the worst elements of
the Christian Right. In order to contain a potential “PR flap” you
allowed our sponsorship of Proposition 8 to stand. Despite all the
church’s words about promoting freedom and human rights, its name is
now in the public record alongside those who promote bigotry and
intolerance, homophobia and fear.

The fact that the Mormon Church drew all the fire, that no one noticed,
doesn’t matter. I noticed. And I felt sick. I wondered how the church
could, in good conscience, through the action of a few and then the
inaction of its leadership, support a bill that strips a group of its
civil rights.

This was my state of mind when I was online doing research and chanced
upon an interview clip with you on CNN. The interview lasted maybe ten
minutes – it was just you and the newscaster. And in it I saw you deny
the church’s policy of disconnection. You said straight-out there was no
such policy, that it did not exist.

I was shocked. We all know this policy exists. I didn’t have to search
for verification – I didn’t have to look any further than my own home.

You might recall that my wife was ordered to disconnect from her parents
because of something absolutely trivial they supposedly did twenty-five
years ago when they resigned from the church. This is a lovely retired
couple, never said a negative word about Scientology to me or anyone
else I know – hardly raving maniacs or enemies of the church. In fact
it was they who introduced my wife to Scientology.

Although it caused her terrible personal pain, my wife broke off all
contact with them. I refused to do so. I’ve never been good at following
orders, especially when I find them morally reprehensible.

For a year and a half, despite her protestations, my wife did not speak
to her parents and they had limited access to their grandchild. It was a
terrible time.

That’s not ancient history, Tommy. It was a year ago.

And you could laugh at the question as if it was a joke? You could
publicly state that it doesn’t exist?

To see you lie so easily, I am afraid I had to ask myself: what else
are you lying about?

The great majority of Scientologists I know are good people who are
genuinely interested in improving conditions on this planet and helping
others. I have to believe that if they knew what I now know, they too
would be horrified. But I know how easy it was for me to defend our
organization and dismiss our critics, without ever truly looking at what
was being said; I did it for thirty-five years. And so, after writing
this letter, I am fully aware that some of my friends may choose to no
longer associate with me, or in some cases work with me. I will always
take their calls, as I always took yours. However, I have finally come
to the conclusion that I can no longer be a part of this group. Frankly,
I had to look no further than your refusal to denounce the church’s
anti-gay stance, and the indefensible actions, and inactions, of those
who condone this behavior within the organization. I am only ashamed
that I waited this many months to act. I hereby resign my membership in
the Church of Scientology.

Gay groups split over mayoral race

By: LAURA DOUGLAS-BROWN
The race to determine who will succeed Atlanta Mayor Shirley Franklin has divided two of Atlanta’s largest gay political groups and drawn an openly gay protest candidate who says he’s running to challenge the status quo. On Tuesday, Atlanta voters will determine who will be their next leader at City Hall, or more likely given the large number of candidates, which two candidates will advance to a Dec. 1 runoff.

The three leading candidates — Atlanta City Council President Lisa Borders, state Sen. Kasim Reed (D-Atlanta) and City Council member Mary Norwood — all have lengthy records with Atlanta’s gay community, and candidate Jesse Spikes has also reached out to gay voters during his campaign. Meanwhile, Kyle Keyser, the openly gay founder of Atlantans Together Against Crime, is running a last-minute grassroots campaign with the message that Atlanta can change.

Georgia Equality endorsed Borders, while Atlanta Stonewall Democrats is backing Reed.

“All the candidates have good, strong track records of working with the LGBT community, [but] at the end of the end of the day we thought that Lisa Borders was going to be the most accessible mayor to the LGBT community,” Georgia Equality Executive Director Jeff Graham said.

Atlanta Stonewall Democrats board member Jason Cecil said his group picked Reed for similar reasons. Reed drew controversy this summer when he said he supported civil unions for gay couples instead of marriage.

“Honestly, Mary and Lisa gave really good answers [to Stonewall’s survey] and Kasim’s biggest drawback, and this provoked a lot of discussion with our board, was his stance on civil unions,” Cecil said.

“We decided that there is not a lot a mayor can do [on that issue] and he’s very strong on everything else, and he has a solid track record, and that’s really what pushed him over the top.”

Reed is also endorsed by Rep. Karla Drenner (D-Avondale Estates), the only openly gay state lawmaker. He told Southern Voice he’s worked with Stonewall Democrats since he joined the General Assembly in 1999.

Borders is a fixture at gay events such as Atlanta Pride and the annual Human Rights Campaign Dinner, and has received credit for negotiating a compromise to return Pride to Piedmont Park this year on Halloween. Reed has a 10-year history in the Georgia General Assembly, where he supported Georgia’s first hate crime law in 1999, advocated for HIV funding, fought the 2004 state constitutional amendment banning gay marriage, and recently passed a bill requiring HIV testing and counseling for inmates. Norwood has said her connections to the community go back to her work with the Atlanta Opera in the mid 1990s. On the City Council, she helped work out a compromise where AIDS Walk Atlanta could return to Piedmont Park in 2008.

Norwood, the only leading candidate not to be endorsed by a gay organization, told Southern Voice she understood and promised to advance gay concerns if elected.

“Stonewall Democrats are a Democratic organization and I’ve always understood that they want someone with a great big ‘D’ on their jacket. I’ve always maintained that I am purple. I am fiscally conservative and socially liberal, and I maintain that is where most people are,” Norwood said.

Marriage vs. civil unions

The mayoral race drew early headlines on gay issues when five candidates attended a May 21 forum hosted by the Atlanta Stonewall Democrats and Georgia Log Cabin Republicans at Amsterdam Cafe.

Borders, Norwood, Reed, Spikes and former Atlanta finance manager Glenn Thomas (who later dropped out of the race) answered questions from the crowd of some 200 people. Keyser did not enter the mayoral race until September.

Borders and Reed both referenced their past records of working with gay groups on a variety of issues, while Norwood and Spikes spoke about their vision for the city.

When the candidates were asked to state their beliefs on allowing same-sex couples to marry in a one-word answer, Spikes and Borders both said they support same-sex marriage, while Reed said “civil unions.” Norwood left before the question portion of the forum.

Reed’s staff sought out Southern Voice to clarify his position and he gave an extended interview on the subject the following day.

“Where I am is that like anyone else I have my own personal faith, and I’m working through issues about marriage equality in my own private way, as my own private person,” Reed said. “I have believed, as I have for a long time, in civil unions and being forward leaning toward the LGBT community before really anyone ever noticed.”

Reed said that he has let Georgia Equality know since ...

Homosexuality and psychology

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Sexuality portal

Psychology was one of the first disciplines to study homosexuality as a discrete phenomenon. In the late 19th century, and throughout most of the 20th century, it was standard for psychology to view homosexuality in terms of pathological models. In 1973 the American Psychiatric Association declassified homosexuality as a mental disorder. The American Psychological Association Council of Representatives followed in 1975
* 1 Major areas of psychological research
o 1.1 Etiology of homosexuality
o 1.2 Discrimination
o 1.3 Mental health issues
o 1.4 Suicide
o 1.5 Sexual orientation identity development
o 1.6 Fluidity of homosexuality
o 1.7 Parenting
* 2 Psychotherapy
o 2.1 Relationship counseling
o 2.2 Gay affirmative psychotherapy
o 2.3 Sexual orientation identity exploration
* 3 Developments in Individual Psychology
* 4 See also
* 5 References
* 6 Resources and external links



Major areas of psychological research

Major psychological research into homosexuality is divided into five categories:[2]

1. What causes some people to be attracted to their own sex?
2. What causes discrimination against people with a homosexual orientation and how can this be influenced?
3. Does having a homosexual orientation affect one's health status, psychological functioning or general well-being?
4. What determines successful adaptation to rejecting social climates? Why is homosexuality central to the identity of some people, but peripheral to the identity of others?
5. How do the children of homosexual people develop?

Psychological research in these areas has been important to counteracting prejudicial attitudes and actions, and to the gay and lesbian rights movement generally

Numerous different theories have been proposed to explain the development of homosexuality, but there is so far no universally accepted account of the origins of a sexual preference for persons of one's own sex.[3]
Discrimination

Homophobia and Societal attitudes toward homosexuality


Anti-gay attitudes and behaviors (sometimes called homophobia or heterosexism) have been objects of psychological research. Such research usually focuses on attitudes hostile to gay men, rather than attitudes hostile to lesbians.[2] Anti-gay attitudes often found in those who do not know gay people on a personal basis.[4] There is also a high risk for anti-gay bias in psychotherapy with lesbian, gay, and bisexual clients

One study found that "families with a strong emphasis on traditional values - implying the importance of religion, an emphasis on marriage and having children - were less accepting of homosexuality than were low-tradition families."[6] One study found that parents who respond negatively to their child's sexual orientation tended to have lower self-esteem and negative attitudes toward women, and that "negative feelings about homosexuality in parents decreased the longer they were aware of their child's homosexuality

One study found that nearly half of its sample had been the victim of verbal or physical violence because of their sexual orientation, usually committed by men. Such victimization is related to higher levels of depression, anxiety, anger, and symptoms of post-traumatic stress.


Mental health issues

Psychological research in this area includes examining mental health issues (including stress, depression, or addictive behavior) faced by gay and lesbian people as a result of the difficulties they experience because of their sexual orientation, physical appearance issues, eating disorders, or gender atypical behavior.

* Drug and alcohol use: Gay men are not at a higher risk for drug or alcohol abuse than heterosexual men, but lesbian women may be at a higher risk than heterosexual women. This finding is contrary to a common assumption that, because of the issues people face relating to coming out and anti-gay attitudes, drug and alcohol use is higher among lesbian, gay, and bisexual people than heterosexuals.[9] Several clinical reports address methods of treating alcoholism in lesbian, gay, and bisexual clients specifically, including fostering greater acceptance of the client's sexual orientation


* Psychiatric disorders: In a Dutch study, gay men reported significantly higher mood and anxiety disorders than straight men, and lesbians were significantly more likely to experience depression (but not other mood or anxiety disorders) than straight women.[11] This difference may be caused by the stresses gay and lesbian people face stemming from anti-gay attitudes. However, a Netherlands study (where homosexuality is much more widely accepted than that in the U.S.) shows that mental health problems in homosexuals are still much higher than in heterosexuals, despite the more tolerant society


* Physical appearance and eating disorders: Gay men tend to be more concerned about their physical appearance than straight men.[13] Lesbian women are at a lower risk for eating disorders than heterosexual women


* Gender atypical behavior: While this is not a disorder, gay men may face difficulties due to being more likely to display gender atypical behavior than heterosexual men.[15] The difference is less pronounced between lesbians and straight women

* Minority Stress: Stress caused from a sexual stigma, manifested as prejudice and discrimination, is a major source of stress for people with a homosexual orientation. Sexual-minority affirming groups and ex-gay groups help counteract and buffer minority stress


* Ego-dystonic sexual orientation: Conflict between religious identity and sexual orientation identity can cause severe stress, causing some people to want to change their sexual orientation. Sexual orientation identity exploration can help individuals evaluate the reasons behind the desire to change and help them resolve the conflict between their religious and sexual identity, either through sexual orientation identity reconstruction or affirmation therapies. Therapists are to offer acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome.[17] Ego-dystonic sexual orientation is a disorder where a person wishes their sexual orientation were different because of associated psychological and behavioral disorders.

* Sexual relationship disorder: People with a homosexual orientation in mixed-orientation marriages may struggle with the fear of the loss their marriage. Therapists should focus exploring the underlying personal and contextual problems, motivations, realities, and hopes for being in, leaving, or restructuring the relationship and should not focus solely on one outcome such as divorce or marriage.[17] Sexual relationship disorder is a disorder where the gender identity or sexual orientation interferes with maintaining or forming of a relationship.

Suicide

The likelihood of suicide attempts are increased in both gay males and lesbians, as well as bisexuals of both sexes when compared to their heterosexual counterparts.[18][19][20] The trend of having a higher incident rate among females is no exception with lesbians or bisexual females and when compared with homosexual males, lesbians are more likely to attempt than gay or bisexual males.[21]

Studies vary with just how increased the risk is compared to heterosexuals with a low of 0.8-1.1 times more likely for females[22] and 1.5-2.5 times more likely for males.[23][24] The highs reach 4.6 more likely in females[25] and 14.6 more likely in males.[2]

Race and age play a factor in the increased risk. The highest ratios for males are attributed to caucasians when they are in their youthhood. By the age of 25, their risk is down to less than half of what it was however black gay males risk steadily increases to 8.6 times more likely. Through a lifetime the risks are 5.7 for white and 12.8 for black gay and bisexual males. Lesbian and bisexual females have opposite effects with less attempts in youthhood when compared to heterosexual females. Through a lifetime the likelihood to attempt nearly triple the youth 1.1 ratio for caucasion females, however for black females the rate is effected very little (less than 0.1 to 0.3 difference) with heterosexual black females having a slightly higher risk throughout most of the age-based study.[2]

Gay and lesbian youth who attempt suicide are disproportionately subject to anti-gay attitudes, and have weaker skills for coping with discrimination, isolation, and loneliness,[2][26] and were more likely to experience family rejection[27] than those who do not attempt suicide. Another study found that gay and bisexual youth who attempted suicide had more feminine gender roles,[28] adopted an LGB identity at a young age and were more likely than peers to report sexual abuse, drug abuse, and arrests for misconduct.[28] One study found that same-sex sexual behavior, but not homosexual attraction or homosexual identity, was significantly predictive of suicide among Norwegian adolescents.[29]
Sexual orientation identity development
Main article: Sexual orientation identity

* Coming out: Many gay and lesbian people go through a "coming out" experience at some point in their lives. Psychologists often say this process includes several stages "in which there is an awareness of being different from peers ('sensitization'), and in which people start to question their sexual identity ('identity confusion'). Subsequently, they start to explore practically the option of being gay or lesbian and learn to deal with the stigma ('identity assumption'). In the final stage, they integrate their sexual desires into a position understanding of self ('commitment')."[2] However, the process is not always linear[30] and it may differ for lesbians and gay men.[31]

* Different degrees of coming out: One study found that gay men are more likely to be out to friends and siblings than co-workers, parents, and more distant relatives.[32]

* Coming out and well-being: Same-sex couples who are openly gay are more satisfied in their relationships.[33] For women who self-identify as lesbian, the more people know about her sexual orientation, the less anxiety, more positive affectivity, and greater self-esteem she has.[34]

* Rejection of gay identity: Various studies report that for some religious people, rejecting a gay identity appears to relieve the distress caused by conflicts between religious values and sexual orientation.[35][36][37][38][17] After reviewing the research, Dr. Glassgold of the American Psychological Association said some people are content in denying a gay identity and there is no clear evidence of harm.[39]

Fluidity of homosexuality

The American Psychiatric Association (APA) states that "some people believe that sexual orientation is innate and fixed; however, sexual orientation develops across a person’s lifetime".[40] In a statement issued jointly with other major American medical organizations, the American Psychological Association states that "different people realize at different points in their lives that they are heterosexual, gay, lesbian, or bisexual".[41] A report from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health states that, "For some people, sexual orientation is continuous and fixed throughout their lives. For others, sexual orientation may be fluid and change over time".[42] Lisa Diamond's study "Female bisexuality from adolescence to adulthood" suggests that there is "considerable fluidity in bisexual, unlabeled, and lesbian women's attractions, behaviors, and identities".[43][44]
Research here focuses on the impact (if any) on children of growing up with one or more parents who have a homosexual orientation.
[edit] Psychotherapy

Most people with a homosexual orientation who seek psychotherapy do so for the same reasons as straight people (stress, relationship difficulties, difficulty adjusting to social or work situations, etc.); their sexual orientation may be of primary, incidental, or no importance to their issues and treatment. Whatever the issue, there is a high risk for anti-gay bias in psychotherapy with lesbian, gay, and bisexual clients.[5]
Relationship counseling

Most relationship issues are shared equally among couples regardless of sexual orientation, but LGB clients additionally have to deal with homophobia, heterosexism, and other societal oppressions. Individuals may also be at different stages in the coming out process. Often, same-sex couples do not have as many role models of successful relationships as opposite-sex couples. There may be issues with gender-role socialization that does not affect opposite-sex couples.[45]

A significant number of men and women experience conflict surrounding homosexual expression within a mixed-orientation marriage.[46] Therapy may include helping the client feel more comfortable and accepting of same-sex feelings and to explore ways of incorporating same-sex and opposite-sex feelings into life patterns.[47] Although a strong homosexual identity was associated with difficulties in marital satisfaction, viewing the same-sex activities as compulsive facilitated commitment to the marriage and to monogamy.[48]
Gay affirmative psychotherapy
Main article: Gay affirmative psychotherapy

Gay affirmative psychotherapy is a form of psychotherapy for gay and lesbian clients which encourages them to accept their sexual orientation, and does not attempt to change their sexual orientation to heterosexual, or to eliminate or diminish their same-sex desires and behaviors. The American Psychological Association (APA) offers guidelines and materials for gay affirmative psychotherapy.[49] Practitioners of gay affirmative psychotherapy states that homosexuality or bisexuality is not a mental illness, and that embracing and affirming gay identity can be a key component to recovery from other mental illnesses or substance abuse.[49] Some people may find neither gay affirmative therapy nor conversion therapy appropriate, however. Clients whose religious beliefs are inconsistent with homosexual behavior may require some other method of integrating their conflicting religious and sexual selves.[50]
[edit] Sexual orientation identity exploration
See also: Ego-dystonic sexual orientation

The APA recommends that if a client wants treatment to change his sexual orientation, the therapist should explore the reasons behind the desire, without favoring any particular outcome. The therapist should neither promote nor reject the idea of celibacy, but help the client come to their own decisions by evaluating the reasons behind the patient's goals.[51] One example of sexual orientation identity exploration is Sexual Identity Therapy.[17]

After exploration, a patient may proceed with Sexual orientation identity reconstruction, which helps a patient reconstruct sexual orientation identity. Psychotherapy, support groups, and life events can influence identity development; similarly, self-awareness, self-conception, and identity may evolve during treatment.[17] It can change sexual orientation identity (private and public identification, and group belonging), emotional adjustment (self-stigma and shame reduction), and personal beliefs, values and norms (change of religious and moral belief, behavior and motivation).[17] Some therapies include Gender Wholeness Therapy.[52] Participation in an ex-gay groups can also help a patient develop a new sexual orientation identity.[17]
Developments in Individual Psychology

In contemporary Adlerian thought homosexuals are not considered within the problematic discourse of the "failures of life". Christopher Shelley (1998), an Adlerian psychotherapist, published a volume of essays in the 1990s that feature Freudian, (post)Jungian and Adlerian contributions that demonstrate affirmative shifts in the depth psychologies. These shifts show how depth psychology can be utilized to support rather than pathologise gay and lesbian psychotherapy clients. The Journal of Individual Psychology, the English language flagship publication of Adlerian Psychology, released a volume in the summer of 2008 that reviews and corrects Adler's previously held beliefs on the homosexual community.

Relationship counseling

Relationship counseling is the process of counseling the parties of a relationship in an effort to recognize and to better manage or reconcile troublesome differences and repeating patterns of distress. The relationship involved may be between members of a family or a couple (see also family therapy), employees or employers in a workplace, or between a professional and a client.

Couple therapy (or relationship therapy) is a related and different process. It may differ from relationship counseling in duration. Short term counseling may be between 1 to 3 sessions whereas long term couples therapy may be between 12 and 24 sessions. An exception being brief or solution focused couples therapy. In addition, counseling tends to be more 'here and now' and new coping strategies the outcome. Couples therapy is more about seemingly intractable problems with a relationship history, where emotions are the target and the agent of change.

Marriage counseling or marital therapy can refer to either or some combination of the above.

The methods may differ in other ways as well, but the differences may indicate more about the counselor/therapist's way of working than the title given to their process.
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